Day 5: Scorched earth

One of the reasons I wanted to do this fast has to do with Doritos and the Food Network. Allow me to explain.

I watch a lot of Food Network. Shows like "Iron Chef," "Chopped," "Good Eats" — they are tremendous entertainment. But I learn a lot too. One of the things that has especially struck me in the course of my Food Network viewing has been the comments of the judges on the competition shows like "Chopped." Regardless of the ingredients used (which can be quite bizarre), the judges have not only the ability to taste each part, but appreciate each one for its essence, whatever it is that it brings to the dish — the "thingness" of the thing.

By contrast, I often cannot taste and appreciate "thingness." I am a pretty decent cook, and I think I've gotten better over the years, but I do so despite the quite significant handicap that I am unable to taste, and so use the correct amounts of, things like herbs. I use a lot of thyme, but I don't really know what it tastes like. I can't judge the correct balance between oil and vinegar when making salad dressing. As far as I can tell, I can only judge three things: garlic, heat (spiciness) and salt. As a result, my dishes tend to be heavy on those three things.

I have a theory about why that is. For years now, I have subsisted on a diet of processed crap. One of my favorites is Doritos (nacho cheese flavor only, please). I can binge on Doritos like nobody's business. In some ways it feels like demon who tempts with the promise of pleasure, and who indulges you for a time, but who then jabs you with a pitchfork and tosses you into the brimstone. It is a pleasure that destroys.

Specifically, the destruction has to do with my taste buds. After years of living on only artificial junk, which tends to be strongly flavored, I feel like my taste buds have been burned out, and only able to sense ever-stronger flavor. I experience this in a tangible way. After I eat a lot of Doritos, my tongue can feel quite painful. And yet it isn't enough to keep me from eating more, which only exacerbates it. And I end up even more desensitized to flavor.

If I may employ an analogy: When the Soviets retreated in the face of the advancing German army in 1941, they burned the ground, crops, houses, fuel, everything, in order to give the Germans nothing to eat or use. It's a tactic called scorched earth. I imagine that the destruction made it so it took a lot to make something happen on that ground.

I'm hoping that this fast give me the chance to allow something new to grow on the scorched earth, something more subtle. I'm hoping for renewal.

Accidentally Green

4 peaches, stones removed

4 oranges, peeled

1 yellow bell pepper, stem and seeds removed

1 handful spinach

2 Granny Smith apples

1 mango, pureed

1. Buy peaches in season, not from Chile.

2. Juice the spinach last, then add mango puree.

3. Wonder when you stir why the juice is so green.

4. Realize that it's because of the apple skins.